I have several small cuts on both hands, and a huge bruise on one finger. The vein is swollen and gross-looking. What did I do to so brutally treat my hands?

I played volleyball for over an hour yesterday. Yes. It sounds so simple and delightful. Volleyball consists of girls in bikinis running around in the sand, right? All you have to do is hit a big plastic ball, right?

Ha ha! That's what I thought. It's lots and lots of pain, folks. Okay, maybe it's only painful if you suck. I obviously suck.